I am ready to leave. To New York, to Europe, to my future. I feel like I've been waiting my whole life. For the next step to meet the right people, work in the right medium, find the right connections and get the right jobs. I feel like I've been in a progressive state of waiting for years now and if I wait for one more second I might spontaneously combust.
I am getting down to figuring out the last few classes I need to take in order to graduate and it is really reanimating my spirit but at the same time making me realize how badly I am ready to leave and find people who will understand me more than the people that I have met living in Miami. Don't get me wrong, I have never lived in a place that I have felt more accepted but at the same time I still feel like such an outcast in this city. Like I'm on the outside looking in and all I want is to be on the inside.
I'm sorry for this vanity driven post but it is all that has been on my mind recently. These photos were taken several weeks ago but I didn't really have any reason to post them until now. Photography can be a great way to release emotions you don't even know are inside you. That is one of the reasons that I love to photograph myself, because I get that opportunity to express myself in the craziest, strangest, or most vulnerable ways that I only feel comfortable expressing when alone. For me photography is a way to escape my current confides. It is a release into new and surreal worlds that can be created by light or color or shapes. It allows me to create and discover worlds where anything is possible and where I am not tied down by my lack of income, lack of connections, or lack of transportation.
For now I may be stuck in Miami but until my future is nearer I will continue to use photography as my release and this blog as my medicine. Even though I don't have the world's highest page-views of the week and many of you readers are silent it's reassuring to know that even though my real life may be more stagnant then I would like at times through digital media I can release all that is boiling inside of me and you all take the time to see it.